Sunday, January 24, 2016
Downton Abbey: Episode 4 (the one in which everyone but Cher is making a comeback)
While Carson and Elsie are away in Scarborough for their honeymoon (harvesting parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme, no doubt), Thomas is the butler. And don't you forget it, sillies! So when Mrs. Patmore says the po-po are coming to talk to Miss Baxter, Thomas says something to the effect of "Hey! You can't just invite the po-po in here! I'm the butler!" And Mrs. Patmore laughs while I want to yank those two ironstone/creamware pitchers out of her hands and run away, cackling like a maniac. But not Molesley...he wants to be present when Miss Baxter is being interrogated. Seems like the guy she went to jail for is having other girls go to jail for him, too, which is not cool. In fact, some of them are prostitutes now. (Not having any fast-food establishments for fallen women to work at in the 1920s.) Moseley and the po-po want Miss Baxter to attend the hearing and be a witness against him, if necessary. Molesley even quotes Edmund Burke.
Lady Who-Was-The-Mean-One-In-Sense-And-Sensibility is visiting to help the Dowager in her quest for hospital domination. Lady Rosamund will be cheering for the other side. I guess that having all these folks return for the last season is a nice gesture, but sometimes I wonder. Anyhoo, Henry Tolbert is the nephew of the Sense and Sensibility chick, so I guess we need to have a reason to bring him back into the story. Mainly because he races cars and Matthew died in a car and oh, the irony. The Dowager wants to know if she is here to help or irritate.
Mrs. Patmore: You couldn't be harder on those potatoes if you wanted them to confess to spying. And then she calls Daisy Madame Defarge. I *heart* Mrs. Patmore.
Daisy has her knickers in a twist because she thinks they should give the pigman's farm to Mr. Mason. After all, they are giving a cottage to the Carsons.
Henry Tolbert admits that he races on a team. So...is he Dale Earnhardt, Junior?
Smackdowns continue at the dinner table, only this time it isn't Miss Bunting, it's the old broads. I happen to find this terribly amusing.
Henry Tolbert gives Mary his card, suggesting that she call him next time he's in London. They can have lunch or a drink or something. Mm hmm...we all know where that ends up. It's the 'something' you have to look out for, as Mary should well know.
Gwen, a former housemaid, returns as the wife of someone Rosamund is meeting. Unfortunately, she shows up right in the middle of Thomas' existential crisis. Thomas' meanness is catching up with him--no one wants to be his friend and he
is lonely. (Baxter hits the nail on the head when she tells him he's his own worst enemy.) So he takes it out on Gwen by announcing to everyone that she used to be a maid. And then people talk about opportunities for women and how awesome Sybil was to help Gwen find a job and Gwen visits her old peeps. We are one step away from holding hands and twirling.
Anna and Mary race up to London in the middle of the night to see if they can get a doctor to take some stitches to hold Anna's baby in place. Anna still doesn't give Bates the 4-1-1, but whatever. This storyline is almost as draggy as the murder one. I guess Anna and Bates are doomed to a life of storylines that will not die.
(This is the scene where I yell at the television, "I WANT THAT COUCH!!" It would look great at Brandywine.)
So Daisy and Mr. Mason get the Pigman's farm...and Andy says he wants to be a farmer, too. Hmmm.....(I'll admit, it's a sweet-a$$ farm.)
Carson and Mrs......Carson are back and there's a party in the basement. So Mrs. Hughes keeps her former name, not realizing she is seventy years ahead of the times. But Carson...he looks so sad as he peruses his former abode. Is he having second thoughts?