Mrs. Patmore is considering buying horseradish in a jar. I will be honest and admit I didn't know it came any other way. Carson and Hughes are trying to iron out the details of the wedding reception. Carson thinks the servants' hall is fine, but Mrs. Hughes isn't having any of it. She doesn't want to feel like a servant on her wedding day...apparently, she'll be waiting until after the honeymoon, when Carson will expect her to fetch his slippers, among other things *wink, wink*
Lady Mary is taking over the livestock, and she will talk to the Pigman. That Pigman. He probably wonders what the heck he's gotten himself into, what with all the drama at the Abbey--illegitimate children and so forth. Lord tells him, "I know this is a $hitstorm, but these women are all nuts and what the heck can we do?"
Evil Thomas is slightly pitiful, looking for a new job. He is mopey and then is discriminated against for being gay when he interviews for another butling job. The only person who feels sorry for him is Baxter. Carson is particularly prickly.
Of course, healthcare is controversial, as always (whether it's 1925 or 2016.) Do we let our local hospital be gobbled up by the conglomerate, or do we try and keep it local? The more things change, it seems, the more they stay the same. (PS-the hospital where my brother and I were born is no longer a hospital. It's a hair salon now because it didn't want to be gobbled up by one of the larger hospitals. Or is it a tire store?)
I think this is the new obligatory boring storyline for the season, now that Bates and Anna are off the hook. There always has to be one draggy story that you MUST have because it is the law, you know. And it gives Lord Merton-of-the-weenies an opportunity to suck up to Mrs. Crawley and it gives the doc an opportunity to be at odds with Mrs. Crawley, heightening the sexual tension.
Both Ladies Mary and Edith refuse to be thwarted by men who still believe that a woman's place is in the parlor, which is a nice contrast to Mr. Carson, who believes Mrs. Hughes belongs somewhere else entirely. Meanwhile, Anna and Bates are crying in the shoe closet, while Bates informs her that being married means you get to ugly cry all you want and not be judged. (But try gaining forty pounds and see how THAT works out for you, Anna!) And does anyone else notice that there is AL LOT of DRAMA and HEARTACHE and CONFESSION that goes on in that room? As if the boots have some sort of magical power and forces folks to unload their burdens and share their deepest thoughts. Like therapy, only free. And with boots.Bates mentions adoption and Anna says he's too "tribal" at which point I half expected him to break into an indigenous dance around a bonfire. So Mary tells Anna that she'll take her to see a doctor in London and Anna's like, "But I can't afford that
Leave it to our Lady Mary to have the perfect pig-showing outfit.
Apparently, everyone in town turns out for the pig show. I'm thinking how horribly boring one's life must be in order to attend a pig show. (Then I remember my second period class and think what a joyous life it must be to attend pig shows and clean boots and make horseradish as opposed to being cussed at by fourteen year-olds.)
During the excitement of the pig show, Marigold goes missing. In hindsight, Edith is probably thinking "I brought this upon myself, but who knew the Pigman's wife would go cuckoo for cocoa puffs?" though I am fairly certain no one was aware of cocoa puffs at this point in time. Instead, they manage to track down the two of them and they agree that it's probably best if the Pigman's family start over in a galaxy far, far away.
Of course I am thinking, "Does that mean I will never see this wonderful hutch or the glorious transfer ware/crocks/ironstone again??"
And then I weep silently into my wineglass, friends.
Stay tuned for a Downton-related post later this week!
(**Also, I'd love to reply to everyone who comments--it's the teacher in me--but a lot of you are no reply blogger commenters. This makes me sad. So I will be replying to folks as I can through the comment thread, but this takes a lot longer because of that pesky day job, darnit. But thank you from the bottom of my little cantankerous heart!**)