Sunday, January 18, 2015

Downton Abbey, plus my imagination

I've been tarnished once... I won't be tarnished again.

Nice save by the Dowager--Sprat got served a steaming hot mug of Shut the Heck up, while Mary go some 'splainin' to do.  (In my imagination, the Dowager says, "Of course you slept with him!  Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?")

Meanwhile, Rose has been spending all day with the Russians:

I don't know about you, but I would totally live in a place called "Pips Corner."   (In my imagination, I actually BUY one of these, and I move to England and fix it up and Isobel comes for tea and we smack talk about everyone except Cora.  I retain Thomas as my man-about-the-house, and he helps me decorate and gather information I can use against people.)

This is what I found when I googled "House 1927"  It is tres cute, is it not?

A great flurry of activity downstairs, not the least of which is Daisy needing to carry the Spotted Dick. (I'm leaving my imagination out of this one.)
In a related note, how much do I want this cabinet?

This is where Daisy-of-the-ears is determined to learn algebra.  Better her than me is what I always say.

The plot thickens 'round Bates with regard to the death of Green, and that--coupled with the fact that Lady Mary wants her to keep the contraceptive device in the cottage--is all too much for Anna.  I am almost 100% sure that one or the other of these things will become very problematic. (I imagine Bates finds the contraceptive device, and blames Anna for not wanting children and rather than give Lady Mary's confidences away, she leaves Bates and goes to work in a dance hall in London, where she becomes quite famous and she buys a huge townhouse and marries someone posh and eventually Lord Grantham comes to her, begging for a loan.  Meanwhile, Bates keeps himself to himself and dies a sullen, lonely man.)

Braxton's Peter Coyle.  A bad penny? Will he turn up? (I can only imagine.) At least Lady Cora lets Braxton keep her job.

Here is my favorite part of this episode: Saint Cora. (I call her that because she is not going to act a fool with Bob Cratchit  the art guy. She knows which side her bread is buttered on.)
What must it have been like to be a middle-aged woman in 1924? (You know she's middle-aged because she was in Ordinary People  which was made approximately 162 years ago, in movie years.)
What were your options?  Cora wants someone to recognize that she still has something to offer--not youth, perhaps, but other things.  It's like Juror #9's speech in Twelve Angry Men. (Which is 219 movie years old.) She just wants someone to listen to what she has to say.  And then Lord G shows up to "surprise" her, and he's surprised.  Serves you right, for calling her a dog last week.

Shall we give a Hallelujah for the Pigman's shelves?  I *heart* them so much.

The pigman's evil plan to gaslight his wife: bring home a cute little baby girl (when all she has are rowdy boys) and give it to his wife (A free baby!  For free!  You didn't have to get pregnant and fat and cranky and sweaty or go through childbirth where you might die!).  THEN, have the kook from the Abbey (you know, the middle child who has been left at the altar by the old dude and had her new MARRIED boyfriend move to Germany and maybe even be Hitler-ized) come to your house and say she wants to help with the baby girl and then she pretty much STEALS the toddler while you have taken your boys to the dentist...well, I say something funky is not far behind.  (In my imagination, Edith finally goes off the deep end and threatens to kill everyone at the Abbey if she can't take Marigold and run away to America, where she will undoubtedly tell everyone she is a widow.  She'll get a job as a secretary and then work her way up to magazine contributor and editor and she will eventually become Diana Vreeland, and everyone will "oooh" and "aaah" over her fabulous sense of style.  And THAT, my friends, is a little something I like to call 'payback.')

Okay, this isn't exactly Edith and Marigold, but it will have to do.

Lady Mary and Tom (formerly known as the chauffer) come to an agreement that they will support one another, after Tom figures out what Mary's been up to.  He says, "If you love me, you'll support me," after she says "I'm not very keen on Miss Bunting and I can't bear the thought of your leaving."  While I am not necessarily a proponent of a Tom/Mary romance, is that the direction this is taking?
(In my imagination, Mary finds another swarthy guy who sweeps her off her feet in a whirlwind romance, and she makes the abbey into a five-star resort. She is so successful that after WWII, she is the UK's first director of tourism.  Her swarthy guy stays home and takes care of the kids while she helps run the country.)
WTH is this exchange between Gillingham (and Mary looks none-to-thrilled to see him, if you ask me) and Isobel?  He thanks her for always being kind to him.  (In my imagination, you KNOW where this is going, and that would be AMAZEBALLS!  I can see it now: Isobel strutting around with BoyToy on her arm, parading him in front of both the doctor and the Lord Whatshisname...)

Best line of the night once again goes to the Dowager: "In my day a lady was incapable of feeling physical attraction until she had been instructed to do so by her mama." Except, perhaps, where Russians were involved?

Until next time...


Kathleen George said...

I love your storylines better than the series! You have a funny wonderful imagination. I enjoy your reading your blog and honestly write a book! Look forward to next weeks recap. Kathleen in Az

Chris K in Wisconsin said...

I love your recaps and do so look forward to them! I was hoping you would have mentioned the Dowager and the Russian...... a dance at the Winter Palace and skimming over the snow in a sleigh after midnight,,,, did anyone else have visions of Zhivago?? And where did Thomas go? I, too, wondered if Peter Coyle would someday appear if he hears about Braxton's job at Downton w/ a pipeline to more jewels. How many more episodes remain??

Linda @ it all started with paint said...

Bates & Anna's relationship seems so formal and stiff these days. And I'm not sure why they just don't talk about things! I would love to see them at the cottage discussing Mary's poor choices and Green. But, alas, I guess you didn't discuss such things back in that time .

Must agree, your storylines are so much more exciting!

Love the recaps!

:) Linda

Cheryl in Wisconsin said...

Thank you, darling Kirby, for recapping these. Sadly, by 8pm on Sunday nights my eyelids have been too heavy to hold up, especially after some emotional Packer games, and I only make it through the opening credits of this show.

Kim said...

I agree, that was the best line of the night. But not long after we see the Dowager, all blushy and kerflustered by Mr. Russian. rascally scamp!! LOL But whats up with the mouthy Butler? Doesn't he know his place? You would never hear Carson gossiping about who is coming out of hotels with who.....

frances pickard said...

Please start writing for DA - it might save the series! I wonder too about what will happen to this household in the 30's and 40's...for some reason I thought this season started later than 1924. So maybe we should be happy for Daisy that she's good at math and might pass her exams.

Diane Higdon said...

I think you could bring Downton to the 21st century with your writing. Keep em coming. ;)

Danni@SiloHillFarm said...

I still haven't seen this, but you are still very funny lady!

Little Miss Maggie said...

Now you are taking my mind where it hadn't gone before. I will have to stay tuned just to see if your omens come true.

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